My aging hands surprise me
creased skin creased
knuckles and bones and veins
My aging hands surprise me
Her cart was in the middle of the aisle. Her boyfriend said ‘hi’ to me. I mumbled a reply, not even words, really. That cart was in my way. She stared at me. I navigated my cart between hers and the shelves. She did not move.
She was wiping down the gas pumps while I pumped gas. I said ‘hi’ just as squatted down to continue her work. She looked up, smiled, and asked how I was. An honest smile. I returned her smile with my own and wished I said hello while she was standing.
I had the expectation that she might not be friendly. She had disappeared when I entered the store. She was friendly. My hair was messy. Hers was not. We talked about wildflowers, clothing, Ocean City, Maryland, and paying the rent. She asked if the shopping was good in New Jersey. I said no. We both wished we had longer torsos.
During the Tangentially Speaking podcast, Dr. Wallace "J" Nichols tells Chris Ryan about his daughter. He says that when his daughter menstruated he and his wife took this a good sign of her body’s wellness. Presumably, his daughter has health challenges. This part of the conversation stuck with me.Read More
I finally finished this one. It went quickly after I got used to the conversational tone. The book is packed with vintage print ads for pads, tampons, douches, hysteria treatments, etc. They range from quaint to charming to alarming.Read More
I know women are supposed to be good at multi-tasking. I know that I like to do well and be well. Except, I would like to fail at multi-tasking, just so I can be right here with nothing much else to do.Read More
I thought this would be easy, talking about being a woman. Well, it is really is not.
Being a woman is truly ever-shifting. Day by day, moment by moment. I can tell you that is for certain. As a woman with cycles, that is for certain. Things change. Ask me how I am on any day of my cycle, and the answer will be different.Read More
So what makes women uniquely women? Treading on ice, slippery slopes, and other dangerous and overused phrases. There really is no universal experience, it seems. Making generalized statements is dangerous, I agree. Cultures vary so widely. People vary widely. Gender is in flux in the modern, western world, and likely always has been in many times and places.Read More
I forgot! I had planned to nix 30 day challenges in favor of following the moon. That was my plan, way back in December of last year. That plan didn't work out. I am not great at planning. I don't watch the clock very closely, and therefore, I am often late and stressed.Read More
It is on. The next 30 day challenge... because I need some new kinda kick (you get cred if you know who's lyrics those are). It's gonna be about my experience being a woman. And because I am woman and a mother, guess what, I am gonna start... tomorrow.
I had two friends (men) who played instruments, actually played, in fact, one played acoustic guitar really well. Ranging from very pretty, very sweet to very intense stuff. Anyway, they liked me. I liked them. They liked that I didn't know how to play. We spent days and days in the basement or garage making noise. I played in many bands with those guys. Some lasted a month, some lasted years. ISCKYA and TENS Unit were the first two bands, inspired by that raw girl/boy revolutionary spirit of Huggy Bear.Read More
Here's an interview I did via email with Czech musician, writer, and thinker Pavla Jonssonova in 2004. The interview was published on the Tamizdat website. Tamizdat has long been dedicated to international culture - music, art, writing, theater - and enabling the travel and exchange of that creativity across international borders.Read More
People have always had tremendous sway in my life. When I've found a place or space, a vocation or an avocation, and I have liked it or I have stuck around with it...it's often because of the people around me.Read More
January 27, 2018, Day 9 of 30 Day Music Challenge
All I can hear are the sounds of my bones rattling around. That is my music.
Two days of spirit sister time. Listening to stories. Gathering together and taking time to listen and speak and to be heard. Sisters, wherever you are right now, I hope you can hear this song that another sister taught me:
Earth my body
Water my blood
Air my breath
And fire my spirit
Rachel Mackow is a photographer and writer who resides on a ridge in the New Jersey Highlands with her husband and son.
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I'm a writer and photographer, observer and keeper of memories in this space, The Shagbark Speaks. In the other spaces of my life, which take most of my time, I am a wife, mother, native plant grower & natural lands restoration practitioner, and laundress.